Friday, April 5, 2013

The Horrible Mistake of 'People Pleasing'!


Years ago when we first decided to start homeschooling our three, we had opposition from almost everyone in our lives.  I believe my brother was the only person that did not say 'you're making a big mistake'.  Even my sweet hubby was completely opposed to it, he had not done the research I had and didn't understand at all.  I asked him for one year to prove that it was okay and that was that.  He loved that they were home when he was, he worked 2nd shift for years and years.

This post is not about homeschooling, it's about others watching for you to fail.  I know that we were being viewed by sooooo many folks, parents of kids from the school ours were at, family, friends even church friends gave us that weird....'homeschooling huh?'....look.  By this time in my life (I was 39), I had gotten way beyond caring what other people thought, didn't even occur to me to wonder how others were viewing us.  
Some of our other choices had already been questioned and I was just beyond listening to opinions, I prayed and waiting for God's leading.

You see, whether it was Dan asking me to quit working after our first was born, our choice of a teeny tiny house (we loved that house!!!), our church affiliation (Dan converted to being a Baptist after being a Catholic his entire life), our living on a very tight budget (keeping us from taking vacations as others did; drove people crazy that we didn't want to go to Disneyworld, etc.!) or homeschooling....everything was being critiqued and discussed by others, these same friends, family, church folks, etc.

Now, the common denominator in all of these decisions is that they were OUR decisions to make, we asked for no opinions therefore they should not have been given....but given they were!  Everyone had to inform us of what we were doing wrong, pulling us aside and quietly telling us that others had noticed these things also and were we aware that our choices were a bit 'out there', yep they really tried to straighten us out!!!

I'm not saying that these choices would work for everyone and maybe some of them were truly not the best for us, but we made those choices and any achievements or failures we alone would be responsible for.

So, what this 52 year old wife of 30 years and mother of 28 years is saying is this: LET IT GO!!!...let what others say slide off your back and move on with your life.  This is the only way to find joy in the moment.  All that should matter to you or I is that we honor God in ALL we do, then please our spouse, children and family.  Not as in bowing down to anyone else just living alongside and caring and nurturing.  My husband is over me and our home, as the scriptures say.  Having him as an umbrella over our home reminds me that we are covered and have no need to be concerned about the opinions of others.

It's all a very simple equation, even though sometimes it means purging people from your life because they are a deterrant to your walk with Jesus...Christ comes first, if you get this right....everything will be just as it should be.  Such joy!!!!
 

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